Message #9957

[Calliope]

Importance of Walking


 



  1/   Walking 20 minutes can add to your life.
    This enables you at 85 years old
    to spend an additional 5 months in a nursing
    home at $7000 per month.

    2/    My grandpa started walking
     five miles a day when he was 60..
     Now he's 97 years old...
     and we haven't a clue where the hell he is.
     
     3/  I like long walks,
     especially when they are taken
     by people who annoy me.
     
   4/    The only reason I would take up walking
     is so that I could hear heavy breathing again.
     
5/     I have to walk early in the morning,
      before my brain figures out what I'm doing..
     
6/      I joined a health club last year,
     spent about 400 bucks.
     Haven't lost a pound.
     ...apparently you have to actually go there.
   
  7/   Every time I hear the dirty word 'exercise',
     I wash my mouth out with chocolate.
     
8/      I do have flabby thighs,
     but fortunately my stomach covers them.

   9/    The advantage of exercising every day
     is so when you die, they'll say,
     'Well, he looks good doesn't he.'
     
 10/    If you are going to try cross-country skiing,
    start with a small country. 
   
11/     I know I got a lot of exercise
     the last few years,......
     just getting over the hill was enough.
 
12/    We all get heavier as we get older,
     because there's a lot more information in our skulls.
     That's my story and I'm sticking to it.
     
     AND

 13/    Every time I start thinking too much
     about how I look,
     I just find a Happy Hour
     and by the time I leave,
     I look just fine.