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'Learn to say no to spoilt kids'

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guest49
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« on: August 08, 2010, 08:58:37 pm »

New Zealand parents need to "get their back bones back" and learn how to say no to their children to stop what a British psychologist is calling a "spoilt generation".

Aric Sigman made his presence known in New Zealand last week, having been brought over by lobby group Family First to speak at their "Forum on the Family", held in Auckland on Friday.

Sigman, a father of four children, said he had travelled extensively and read hundreds of studies and the one commonality he kept finding throughout the world was that parents had lost control and had no respect from their children. His response was a book entitled The Spoilt Generation. "We now live in the time of the child-centred upbringing," he said.


http://www.stuff.co.nz/life-style/4002856/Learn-to-say-no-to-spoilt-kids


About time someone started the ball rolling.
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« Reply #1 on: August 08, 2010, 10:20:50 pm »

Ah, the mysterious power of having a backbone.

It never ceases to amaze me how many parents can successfully manage adults in a work enviroment but can't manage to stand up to a screaming toddler or whining kid.
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Magoo
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« Reply #2 on: August 09, 2010, 05:12:43 am »

Every kid needs to feel the fear of a wooden spoon paddling its backside.    They are no different from baby animals and need to be house trained and know beyond a shadow of doubt who is the boss and what NO means.            My 'children' are now in their mid 40's and we often speak of this.
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« Reply #3 on: August 09, 2010, 06:35:35 am »

It certainly is time adults all over the world took back the role of parent instead of following the PC rubbish of not wanting to disipline a child because they don't want to hurt their feelings..pff.
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« Reply #4 on: August 09, 2010, 09:20:51 am »

New Zealand parents need to "get their back bones back" and learn how to say no to their children to stop what a British psychologist is calling a "spoilt generation".

Aric Sigman made his presence known in New Zealand last week, having been brought over by lobby group Family First to speak at their "Forum on the Family", held in Auckland on Friday.

Sigman, a father of four children, said he had travelled extensively and read hundreds of studies and the one commonality he kept finding throughout the world was that parents had lost control and had no respect from their children. His response was a book entitled The Spoilt Generation. "We now live in the time of the child-centred upbringing," he said.


http://www.stuff.co.nz/life-style/4002856/Learn-to-say-no-to-spoilt-kids


About time someone started the ball rolling.

The problem is that the PC pultus that latter NZ governments have slapped on our backs has desolved our spines!

Every kid needs to feel the fear of a wooden spoon paddling its backside.    They are no different from baby animals and need to be house trained and know beyond a shadow of doubt who is the boss and what NO means.            My 'children' are now in their mid 40's and we often speak of this.

here here Magoo take a bow.

Ah, the mysterious power of having a backbone.

It never ceases to amaze me how many parents can successfully manage adults in a work enviroment but can't manage to stand up to a screaming toddler or whining kid.

thats because now kids have more rights than adults in this country... and we can only blame ourselves... well more to the point many of the the older generation ie many of the baby boomers etc!
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guest49
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« Reply #5 on: August 09, 2010, 09:59:05 am »

I disagree - well as far as it pertains to the NZ older generation, anyway.

I blame the United Nations and its incredible plethora of childrens rights conventions that our spineless goverments have signed up to.  I blame these same spineless governments of both persuasions, that have emasculated a parents right to bring up and discipline their children.

Everyone can point to a child that has been abused rather than disciplined, but the legislation was there at the time.  All it would have taken was the will to use it and a judiciary with the guts to impose realistic penalties.
I wont even go down the CYPS road!  The way they are set up,  is as a result of the spineless goverments mentioned above........
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« Reply #6 on: August 09, 2010, 10:24:10 am »

I disagree - well as far as it pertains to the NZ older generation, anyway.

I blame the United Nations and its incredible plethora of childrens rights conventions that our spineless goverments have signed up to.  I blame these same spineless governments of both persuasions, that have emasculated a parents right to bring up and discipline their children.


So who voted those governments in???
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guest49
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« Reply #7 on: August 09, 2010, 10:29:57 am »

Buggered if I know!  Certainly not any of my doing!
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« Reply #8 on: August 09, 2010, 10:33:33 am »

I was going to start a new thread on something that made me spit the dummy yesterday but, technically, it can fit in here.

My sons rugby team are going to the Gold Coast in October for a competition.  This has resulted in approximately 2 years of fund raising with each child being expected to raise $2,500 (don't ask me where that number came from).

One of the very lucrative fund raisers they secured was cleaning the AMI Stadium after an event.  

Saturday night had the AB vs Wallabies.  Capacity crowd.  Foul weather.  

Sunday morning 40 people turned up to fund raise and get the stadium cleaned.  With that many people they should have bowled it over in 4 hours.  

Instead, 15 left by 10am.  Another 10 odd had disappeared by 1pm, leaving just 13 people to clean some 39,000 seats (don't get me started on how messy the crowd leaves it, nor why on gods green earth a seat in the stand needs 15 beer bottles for a 3 hour event), anyway, of those 13, 2 were aged under 5 and about half wandered around complaining, kicking up dirt and generally doing jackschit to help.   Mr DT and my 16 year old daughter didn't get home until 6.30pm.   (She was filling in for her brother who was home sick with a raging temperature and cough (including asthma).  The were soaking wet, freezing cold and sore.

Now the system used by the club is you turn up and tell them which player you are funded for, and then $50 is allotted to that player (doesn't matter if you are 4 or 40,  work or not).  I'm of a mind that if you bill for working, you work.  While it isn't life or death, it is basically fraud not to.  

The manager rang me - he heard me.  I'm thinking there might be a bit of a shake up at club.  Too late to really be effective, but maybe next time they will use a better system.

The parents of a lot of the team are every bit as 'spoilt brat' as the kids themselves.  And what the hell are they doing dragging a 4 year old along to count as a worker?
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« Reply #9 on: August 09, 2010, 09:49:56 pm »

I was going to start a new thread on something that made me spit the dummy yesterday but, technically, it can fit in here.

My sons rugby team are going to the Gold Coast in October for a competition.  This has resulted in approximately 2 years of fund raising with each child being expected to raise $2,500 (don't ask me where that number came from).

One of the very lucrative fund raisers they secured was cleaning the AMI Stadium after an event.  

Saturday night had the AB vs Wallabies.  Capacity crowd.  Foul weather.  

Sunday morning 40 people turned up to fund raise and get the stadium cleaned.  With that many people they should have bowled it over in 4 hours.  

Instead, 15 left by 10am.  Another 10 odd had disappeared by 1pm, leaving just 13 people to clean some 39,000 seats (don't get me started on how messy the crowd leaves it, nor why on gods green earth a seat in the stand needs 15 beer bottles for a 3 hour event), anyway, of those 13, 2 were aged under 5 and about half wandered around complaining, kicking up dirt and generally doing jackschit to help.   Mr DT and my 16 year old daughter didn't get home until 6.30pm.   (She was filling in for her brother who was home sick with a raging temperature and cough (including asthma).  The were soaking wet, freezing cold and sore.

Now the system used by the club is you turn up and tell them which player you are funded for, and then $50 is allotted to that player (doesn't matter if you are 4 or 40,  work or not).  I'm of a mind that if you bill for working, you work.  While it isn't life or death, it is basically fraud not to.  

The manager rang me - he heard me.  I'm thinking there might be a bit of a shake up at club.  Too late to really be effective, but maybe next time they will use a better system.

The parents of a lot of the team are every bit as 'spoilt brat' as the kids themselves.  And what the hell are they doing dragging a 4 year old along to count as a worker?

I agree DT that is so wrong and does nothing to teach the youth personal responsibility.

On a lighter side, I was at the mess on Friday afternoon for a few quiets and the old meat raffle tickets came around the table for purchase. The home finance manager had only supplied me with enough coinage for the liquid stuff so I said 'no' to a raffle ticket. The whole table then joined in calling me stingy and not supporting the mess. So again I said 'no' and again the whole table just wouldn't shut up. So I told them all that it amazes me that my 10 month old daughter understands the word 'no' yet I seem to be surrounded by a bunch of imcompetant morons disguised as adults that lack the intelligence to comprehend a 1 syallable, 2 letter word. The whole table then went quiet and left me alone.

So it isn't just kids that don't understand no.
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« Reply #10 on: August 10, 2010, 07:38:16 am »

Quote
The home finance manager had only supplied me with enough coinage for the liquid stuff so I said 'no' to a raffle ticket


Ummmm,

 so she has not yet learned to say "no" either.    That figures.   

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Magoo
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« Reply #11 on: August 10, 2010, 08:19:46 am »

Quote
The home finance manager had only supplied me with enough coinage for the liquid stuff so I said 'no' to a raffle ticket.
I wonder why she didn't think to add that you could spend the coinage on a food raffle if you wanted to make a choice.



You aren't getting much support are you Crusader.  Grin
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« Reply #12 on: August 10, 2010, 12:44:04 pm »

Crusader, when I was a kid my father would never take our school fund raising raffle tickets to work. It wasn't until years later we found out why.

Money was tight, Dad had a very small weekly allowance that covered petrol for the car, bridge toll and cups of tea but that was about all. He didn't drink so there was no beer money.

He invented a rule for himself, he would never sell raffle tickets and he would never buy any either. He did buy one or two of us but the raffle tickets or Girl Guide Biscuits never went to work.

He even had a good excuse for driving our old rusty mini to work even though he was on a good income being one of the workshop senior supervisors. He would just point out that it took skill to keep a car that old on the road which proved he was a good mechanic. I still don't know if the apprentises ever figured out that is was because 3 kids and a mortgage didn't leave enough money for things like a newer car that used more petrol.
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The way politicians run this country a small white cat should have no problem http://sally4mp.blogspot.com/

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